i’ve seen many portraits of Jesus before. But last night, when i was about to sleep and i was thinking of my personal problem. I did not even pray. Instead, i talk to him sincerely. I know i can’t hide anything from him. I don’t hesitate to ask him. Why am i encountering such emptiness from my family. Am i the only one who’s suffering the same way?

I shut my eyes while thinking of him. I can feel his embrace and his breathe towards me. It feels like he let me realize everything. I am not alone. Suffering is not the exact term. I have my love ones who supports me all the way. I’m just the one who says they don’t love me and pushing myself away from them. In fact, i am not suffering at all. I am still happy. still happy.In a day, I know i’m not completely sad and wasted. I just don’t look for the happier side. I prefer thinking of my woes!
…….

Am i dreaming and sleeping? No. My mind is wide awake keep talking for God. I seek for him, his there. I know he loves me and unlike any others, i know he will not leave me.

I woke up exactly 3:00 a.m. I fell asleep thinking of him, Which i don’t usually think. I know him, but I rarely think of him. I was about to sleep when i see our altar. I look at him closely, he’s looking at me too!

I haven’t seen God yet. But I love him. I want to know how kind he is personally.